50 Things I Cannot Do To....... ENGLAND
1. I cannot tweak his eyebrows.
2. Even if they need to be tweaked.
3. But, sadly, not by me.
4. Probably by America.
5. England fancies America.
6. I'm not allowed to mention this to anyone.
7. Even if it is really obvious.
8. And even if it would be really fun to see France's reaction.
9. Because France doesn't know despite the fact that it is really obvious.
10. I must not stray off topic.
11. England and Germany wouldn't like it.
12. I mustn't tell England his cooking is terrible.
13. Even if it is.
14. I mustn't tell him his cooking is wonderful.
15. Even if it isn't.
16. I mustn't sample his cooking to test either of these theories.
17. I mustn't sample his cooking not to test these theories.
18. I mustn't sample his cooking at all.
19. I would probably die.
20. I mustn't die so I can see England as a cook in hell.
21. Or as a policeman in heaven.
22. Even if that means he would have handcuffs.
23. and you can do a lot of fun things with handcuffs.
24. In hell, Germany has handcu